160 Comments
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Sogole Kane's avatar

You forgot the former polish only girlies who became moms and no longer have time to go to the nail salon so we are bare-nailed by force and default 😂 this was brilliant as always Tariro!! Xx

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tariro makoni's avatar

LOL you’re right — I am DEF least well-versed in the mom to young kids universe😭 thank U for always bringing the nuanced clarity I neeeeeeed 🥹🥹❤️❤️❤️

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Sogole Kane's avatar

Always happy to chime in with EIHM POV Lolol !! 💚

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tariro makoni's avatar

STOOOOP EIHM CHANGED MY LIFE???????

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Emily Grady Dodge's avatar

Dead ☠️

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Irene Kim (김애린)'s avatar

Okay I was wrong, I went to the comments before reading the article. I’m bare nail archetype #1.

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tariro makoni's avatar

CHIIIICCCCCC

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Irene Kim (김애린)'s avatar

Chic, or lazy? Mostly the latter for me.

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Hillary Kerr's avatar

It me!

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tariro makoni's avatar

queeeeeen ❤️

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Sade Strehlke's avatar

Mom of 3 littles! My nails are always done in only one of 3 shades over last 10 years 😂

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Amber Nelson's avatar

I am a regular polish girlie but I do my nails myself….i wear them long, file them into a soft almond shape, and paint them candy apple red, burgundy red, ballet pink, satin pink, or metallic blue (my wildcard lol). Think 50s housewife nails. I redo them every 3-4 days. My toes are always red or pink.

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tariro makoni's avatar

EVERY 3-4 DAYS, 50s HOUSEWIFE NAILS/COLORS — my mind is reeling. I’m obsessed. I need you to also have a take on jelo molds???? Amaze

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Amber Nelson's avatar

Haha thank you! My jell-o mold take is that I want one lol I want to make a green jello monstrosity with chunks of pineapple and maraschino cherries suspended in it with Cool Whip on top to serve my beau for dessert when he comes over. It would be hilarious

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Shelly Stallard's avatar

That jello is good, in my opinion anyway 😁

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GSR's avatar
Feb 10Edited

Same, I paint mine at home with a shorter soft almond shape within a certain color range (f*ck me red to f*ck you burgundy). Top them with Seche Vite UV topcoat, put them under my UV lamp and I'm good to go. Only thing I miss about nail salons are the hand massages.

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Amber Nelson's avatar

“F*ck me red” and “f*ck you burgundy” I’m OBSESSED with these terms

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Amber Joy Olney's avatar

Same same, and my name is Amber! I actually am a housewife, so it also tracks. The money is going to the kids’ new school polos not the nail salon! 😩 It’s VERY POLITICAL!

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Amber Nelson's avatar

Salon visits are so expensive! What are your favorite nail polish brands? I’m pretty loyal to Essie

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Amber Joy Olney's avatar

I have recently become dedicated to Sally Hansen insta-dri — because when I finally do find the time to sit down and do my nails, it’s about an hour or two before bed and I need it to be COMPLETELY dry in time for it not to get smudged while I’m brushing my teeth and pulling up my covers. So specific?

I love SH’s bottle and brush shape — SUCH a delight to hold and use — and am generally pleased with the quality of two coats plus their clear top layer. I’ve also used Expressie by Essie and am happy about both brands’ color selections. Speed is the name of the game! I redo them about every Friday or Saturday night, and LOVE painting them, so I don’t mind if they start to chip near the end of the week.

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Justine's avatar

Same as you diy housewife (not a housewife btw) but 1x a week reg polish, sometimes with a simple design on one or two, decal etc. Was at a conference yesterday and a woman asked if I thought the price of gels and nail art was outrageous and said I diy and she was floored. We talked for no joke, 30 mins about nails. Made my day!!

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tariro makoni's avatar

Love the 30 min convo on nails — ugh nothing better

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Amber Nelson's avatar

That’s so cool!! I’ve never been able to do designs but I def want to try a half moon manicure a la Dita von teese because I hear the French tip stickers work well for that

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Justine's avatar

Like the nails itself it's practice and tiny brushes. I pick one nail and do it well, the z'ers usually compliment me which makes me happy dance. If you do come back with pics puhhhhhlease!

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Andrea's avatar

Reg polish forever! Weekly manicures and am FIERCELY loyal to Cirque Colors, amazing quality, colors, finishes. Slowly collecting all of their colors

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adriana elisa's avatar

DIY nail girlies unite! Been doing my nails on my own my whole life. I remember my mom (a hairstylist) teaching me how to trim my cuticles and apply nail polish on my own when I was 12.

I do weekly manicures with my home stash. Nothing beats the Seche Vite gel top coat - makes a regular manicure last a week easily.

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Amber Nelson's avatar

The Seche vite top coat is my favorite. I use the gel effect version in the blue bottle. I love how fast it dries too.

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Jean Joaillerie's avatar

I would love to read a follow up post about what your nail shape says about you.......

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tariro makoni's avatar

Looool noted!!

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Jean Joaillerie's avatar

Y alors? Please let me know when you have weighed in on that!

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maybe: andré's avatar

this reminds me of my thoughts on jessica chastain’s political thriller “miss sloane” (2016) - though i bet they didn’t think it was the manicure that would be political in the end.

she’s a lobbyist who is her job and doesn’t have/make time for the mundane - she outsources her sex life down to a standing weekly appointment at the same hotel, has one bag (saint laurent sac de jour as they couldn’t secure a birkin according to the costume designer) and a dark/black polish manicure (though i’m unsure of type) because she doesn’t have the time! and that’s what has rubbed me the wrong way since i read about the thought process.

a dark polish chips and if you’re a streamlined, minimalist redhead in power neutrals, why choose a colour that takes maintenance? her character would surely be a buff and go - more LSD than bare-nailed contessa

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tariro makoni's avatar

As usual…. Obsessed with you, obsessed with this comment???? YOU’RE SO RIGHT about the dark polish. I cannot believe this reference/ pull it’s so iconic???

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purenostalgia's avatar

Actually, if I remember correctly, Jessica Chastain observed real female lobbyists and most of them wore dark nail polish as a kind of power move. So her character is wearing it for the same reason as the power neutrals.

I've always remembered this little bit of trivia because my favorite nail polish colour is black and I totally understand how it makes you feel badass / just that bit more untouchable.

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tariro makoni's avatar

FASCINATING!!! I spent time as a senate intern during uni (lol) and feel like I saw mostly neutrals and bare but in an academic way…less Olivia pope??? I’d love to observe lobbyists they are so fascinating as a demo (personality et al)

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maybe: andré's avatar

that makes a lot of sense. also ties into why i thought the movie should’ve just been called “sloane” - miss sloane didn’t feel like it matched her severity, but i get that it echoes how she’s addressed throughout

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Mikala Jamison's avatar

didn't even have to get to the end of the list to know i was bottom of the list lmao

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tariro makoni's avatar

LOLOL which is a very normal and valid position to be in to be CLEAR

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N/'s avatar

this is pure sociological excellence! I love the Charli XCX chipped nails archetype, it's like the daughter of Courtney Love's chipped dark riot grrl manicures - fitting as Charli was actually born in the same month as Courtney's daughter.

I was a non-status bare-nails girl for the first 2 decades of my life (no posh parents just a Catholic girls' school that outlawed makeup/nail varnish) but always yearned to be a regular polish queen, and now I have the regular polish of my dreams (as a DIY peasant though)

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tariro makoni's avatar

“Pure sociological excellence” I’ll CRY😭😭😭 thank you!!!! So true about Courtney love too!! And ugh the way I yearn to be a regular polish girl - you’ve made it ❤️

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By Benchis's avatar

Perpetually in the reg nail polish universe or bare nails, no in between for me lol

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tariro makoni's avatar

CHIC but OFC U ARE (given you’re textbook EIHG🪂)

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Katy Doncer's avatar

Where are the wholesale press-on girlies 😩

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tariro makoni's avatar

Ugh — I will always be honest when I don’t know enough about something!!! I don’t have enough press on queens in my life to have a significant enough sample size to make any claims <\3

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Katy Doncer's avatar

I’m dead 😂 I respect a woman who draws conclusions that are statistically rigorous

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tariro makoni's avatar

TM CULTURE😂😂😂😂

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Malebogo Modise's avatar

It depends what kind to press ons I guess. Hand crafted or store bought. I wonder if the designs and colours would add to what the manicure says about your status. 🤔

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Katie Stone's avatar

tariro my jaw is on the floor. i think this is your best yet

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tariro makoni's avatar

Omg Katie!!!!!! 🥹🥹🥹🥹🥹🥹

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Bianca ONeill's avatar

What about 4b, Italian bitch nails; where you’re not rich, you just get over the top eurotrash nail art for half your weekly salary because it’s the only thing that makes you feel alive (me) 🥲

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tariro makoni's avatar

Looool love this, an important distinction — dopamine dollars are necessary

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Bianca ONeill's avatar

🙃

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Katie C's avatar

Speaking of Veblen and nail polish, Elizabeth Currid-Halkett has a whole aside on Essie's Ballet Slippers as a signifier of class in The Sum of Small Things. Fascinating topic!

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tariro makoni's avatar

Omgggg I love that book maybe it seeped into my pores unknowingly!!!!

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Cait Kady's avatar

I came here to say this too! That is a fascinating book.

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Rebecca Jarrett's avatar

Can I send you my nail routine for further analysis plzzzz

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tariro makoni's avatar

LOOOOL bex 😭😭😭

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Rebecca Jarrett's avatar

Asking for a friend ✨

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tariro makoni's avatar

😂😂😂😂😂

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ET's avatar

Ahaha I loveeeee this 💅 hard agree, anything that implies you’re not washing dishes/cleaning the fucking grout often enough to have an immaculate regular-polish manicure is top tier rich bitch territory imo!! I would say I think you’re missing one angle of the always-bare girls (as a lifelong one) - sometimes you’re just gay lol. speaking for myself at least 😂

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tariro makoni's avatar

LOLOL true!!!!!!!

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Hayden Freedman's avatar

Carole Radziwill mentioned 🫡

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tariro makoni's avatar

Yessssss chic

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Dikachi O's avatar

Alway been a bare nail or regular polish girlie

But I've been made fun of by various people cause my nails aren't "done" so what does that say about them?

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tariro makoni's avatar

I agree they simply don’t get it and we feel sorry for them :)

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Ali Kriegsman's avatar

that they’re / we are losers. i’m saying this as the lowest on the totem pole. i’m so collectively sorry , from all of us 🥹🙏

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Colu Henry's avatar

This is genius. I know where I stand now, thank you.

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tariro makoni's avatar

Omg it’s my honor 🤝🤝🤝🤝

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Colu Henry's avatar

🙏🏼

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