You forgot the former polish only girlies who became moms and no longer have time to go to the nail salon so we are bare-nailed by force and default 😂 this was brilliant as always Tariro!! Xx
I am a regular polish girlie but I do my nails myself….i wear them long, file them into a soft almond shape, and paint them candy apple red, burgundy red, ballet pink, satin pink, or metallic blue (my wildcard lol). Think 50s housewife nails. I redo them every 3-4 days. My toes are always red or pink.
Haha thank you! My jell-o mold take is that I want one lol I want to make a green jello monstrosity with chunks of pineapple and maraschino cherries suspended in it with Cool Whip on top to serve my beau for dessert when he comes over. It would be hilarious
Same same, and my name is Amber! I actually am a housewife, so it also tracks. The money is going to the kids’ new school polos not the nail salon! 😩 It’s VERY POLITICAL!
I have recently become dedicated to Sally Hansen insta-dri — because when I finally do find the time to sit down and do my nails, it’s about an hour or two before bed and I need it to be COMPLETELY dry in time for it not to get smudged while I’m brushing my teeth and pulling up my covers. So specific?
I love SH’s bottle and brush shape — SUCH a delight to hold and use — and am generally pleased with the quality of two coats plus their clear top layer. I’ve also used Expressie by Essie and am happy about both brands’ color selections. Speed is the name of the game! I redo them about every Friday or Saturday night, and LOVE painting them, so I don’t mind if they start to chip near the end of the week.
Same as you diy housewife (not a housewife btw) but 1x a week reg polish, sometimes with a simple design on one or two, decal etc. Was at a conference yesterday and a woman asked if I thought the price of gels and nail art was outrageous and said I diy and she was floored. We talked for no joke, 30 mins about nails. Made my day!!
That’s so cool!! I’ve never been able to do designs but I def want to try a half moon manicure a la Dita von teese because I hear the French tip stickers work well for that
Like the nails itself it's practice and tiny brushes. I pick one nail and do it well, the z'ers usually compliment me which makes me happy dance. If you do come back with pics puhhhhhlease!
Same, I paint mine at home with a shorter soft almond shape within a certain color range (f*ck me red to f*ck you burgundy). Top them with Seche Vite UV topcoat, put them under my UV lamp and I'm good to go. Only thing I miss about nail salons are the hand massages.
DIY nail girlies unite! Been doing my nails on my own my whole life. I remember my mom (a hairstylist) teaching me how to trim my cuticles and apply nail polish on my own when I was 12.
I do weekly manicures with my home stash. Nothing beats the Seche Vite gel top coat - makes a regular manicure last a week easily.
this is pure sociological excellence! I love the Charli XCX chipped nails archetype, it's like the daughter of Courtney Love's chipped dark riot grrl manicures - fitting as Charli was actually born in the same month as Courtney's daughter.
I was a non-status bare-nails girl for the first 2 decades of my life (no posh parents just a Catholic girls' school that outlawed makeup/nail varnish) but always yearned to be a regular polish queen, and now I have the regular polish of my dreams (as a DIY peasant though)
“Pure sociological excellence” I’ll CRY😭😭😭 thank you!!!! So true about Courtney love too!! And ugh the way I yearn to be a regular polish girl - you’ve made it ❤️
What about 4b, Italian bitch nails; where you’re not rich, you just get over the top eurotrash nail art for half your weekly salary because it’s the only thing that makes you feel alive (me) 🥲
Ugh — I will always be honest when I don’t know enough about something!!! I don’t have enough press on queens in my life to have a significant enough sample size to make any claims <\3
Speaking of Veblen and nail polish, Elizabeth Currid-Halkett has a whole aside on Essie's Ballet Slippers as a signifier of class in The Sum of Small Things. Fascinating topic!
Ughhh I’m a recovering 5 😭 need to join NA. Because the urge to paint these short flimsy haggard fuckers just ONE more time and avoid this limbo until they harden is torture. I’m a 1 in hiding for now lol
I used to be a polish only girl, then had a brief (barf) moment with press-ons and after that decided I’d be bare nails only. It’s been over a year and there’s no way I’m going baaaackkk
You forgot the former polish only girlies who became moms and no longer have time to go to the nail salon so we are bare-nailed by force and default 😂 this was brilliant as always Tariro!! Xx
LOL you’re right — I am DEF least well-versed in the mom to young kids universe😭 thank U for always bringing the nuanced clarity I neeeeeeed 🥹🥹❤️❤️❤️
Always happy to chime in with EIHM POV Lolol !! 💚
STOOOOP EIHM CHANGED MY LIFE???????
Dead ☠️
Okay I was wrong, I went to the comments before reading the article. I’m bare nail archetype #1.
CHIIIICCCCCC
Chic, or lazy? Mostly the latter for me.
It me!
queeeeeen ❤️
I am a regular polish girlie but I do my nails myself….i wear them long, file them into a soft almond shape, and paint them candy apple red, burgundy red, ballet pink, satin pink, or metallic blue (my wildcard lol). Think 50s housewife nails. I redo them every 3-4 days. My toes are always red or pink.
EVERY 3-4 DAYS, 50s HOUSEWIFE NAILS/COLORS — my mind is reeling. I’m obsessed. I need you to also have a take on jelo molds???? Amaze
Haha thank you! My jell-o mold take is that I want one lol I want to make a green jello monstrosity with chunks of pineapple and maraschino cherries suspended in it with Cool Whip on top to serve my beau for dessert when he comes over. It would be hilarious
Same same, and my name is Amber! I actually am a housewife, so it also tracks. The money is going to the kids’ new school polos not the nail salon! 😩 It’s VERY POLITICAL!
Salon visits are so expensive! What are your favorite nail polish brands? I’m pretty loyal to Essie
I have recently become dedicated to Sally Hansen insta-dri — because when I finally do find the time to sit down and do my nails, it’s about an hour or two before bed and I need it to be COMPLETELY dry in time for it not to get smudged while I’m brushing my teeth and pulling up my covers. So specific?
I love SH’s bottle and brush shape — SUCH a delight to hold and use — and am generally pleased with the quality of two coats plus their clear top layer. I’ve also used Expressie by Essie and am happy about both brands’ color selections. Speed is the name of the game! I redo them about every Friday or Saturday night, and LOVE painting them, so I don’t mind if they start to chip near the end of the week.
Same as you diy housewife (not a housewife btw) but 1x a week reg polish, sometimes with a simple design on one or two, decal etc. Was at a conference yesterday and a woman asked if I thought the price of gels and nail art was outrageous and said I diy and she was floored. We talked for no joke, 30 mins about nails. Made my day!!
Love the 30 min convo on nails — ugh nothing better
That’s so cool!! I’ve never been able to do designs but I def want to try a half moon manicure a la Dita von teese because I hear the French tip stickers work well for that
Like the nails itself it's practice and tiny brushes. I pick one nail and do it well, the z'ers usually compliment me which makes me happy dance. If you do come back with pics puhhhhhlease!
Same, I paint mine at home with a shorter soft almond shape within a certain color range (f*ck me red to f*ck you burgundy). Top them with Seche Vite UV topcoat, put them under my UV lamp and I'm good to go. Only thing I miss about nail salons are the hand massages.
“F*ck me red” and “f*ck you burgundy” I’m OBSESSED with these terms
DIY nail girlies unite! Been doing my nails on my own my whole life. I remember my mom (a hairstylist) teaching me how to trim my cuticles and apply nail polish on my own when I was 12.
I do weekly manicures with my home stash. Nothing beats the Seche Vite gel top coat - makes a regular manicure last a week easily.
The Seche vite top coat is my favorite. I use the gel effect version in the blue bottle. I love how fast it dries too.
Perpetually in the reg nail polish universe or bare nails, no in between for me lol
CHIC but OFC U ARE (given you’re textbook EIHG🪂)
didn't even have to get to the end of the list to know i was bottom of the list lmao
LOLOL which is a very normal and valid position to be in to be CLEAR
tariro my jaw is on the floor. i think this is your best yet
Omg Katie!!!!!! 🥹🥹🥹🥹🥹🥹
this is pure sociological excellence! I love the Charli XCX chipped nails archetype, it's like the daughter of Courtney Love's chipped dark riot grrl manicures - fitting as Charli was actually born in the same month as Courtney's daughter.
I was a non-status bare-nails girl for the first 2 decades of my life (no posh parents just a Catholic girls' school that outlawed makeup/nail varnish) but always yearned to be a regular polish queen, and now I have the regular polish of my dreams (as a DIY peasant though)
“Pure sociological excellence” I’ll CRY😭😭😭 thank you!!!! So true about Courtney love too!! And ugh the way I yearn to be a regular polish girl - you’ve made it ❤️
What about 4b, Italian bitch nails; where you’re not rich, you just get over the top eurotrash nail art for half your weekly salary because it’s the only thing that makes you feel alive (me) 🥲
Looool love this, an important distinction — dopamine dollars are necessary
🙃
Can I send you my nail routine for further analysis plzzzz
LOOOOL bex 😭😭😭
Asking for a friend ✨
😂😂😂😂😂
I would love to read a follow up post about what your nail shape says about you.......
Looool noted!!
I’m in between a bare nail and a regular polish but strictly at home girl
Oh STRICTLY AT HOME is very important nuance
Carole Radziwill mentioned 🫡
Yessssss chic
Where are the wholesale press-on girlies 😩
Ugh — I will always be honest when I don’t know enough about something!!! I don’t have enough press on queens in my life to have a significant enough sample size to make any claims <\3
I’m dead 😂 I respect a woman who draws conclusions that are statistically rigorous
TM CULTURE😂😂😂😂
Speaking of Veblen and nail polish, Elizabeth Currid-Halkett has a whole aside on Essie's Ballet Slippers as a signifier of class in The Sum of Small Things. Fascinating topic!
Omgggg I love that book maybe it seeped into my pores unknowingly!!!!
Ughhh I’m a recovering 5 😭 need to join NA. Because the urge to paint these short flimsy haggard fuckers just ONE more time and avoid this limbo until they harden is torture. I’m a 1 in hiding for now lol
HAHAHAHA this is the scathing truth 😭😭😭
I think about this stuff at night. I’m glad I’m not the only one lol.
No we are one as always
I used to be a polish only girl, then had a brief (barf) moment with press-ons and after that decided I’d be bare nails only. It’s been over a year and there’s no way I’m going baaaackkk
Omg PRESS ONS — so jealous of bare nail girls you are truly infallible